New Year, Same Single Struggle?

Hey guys! Long time no speak! I’ve been MIA, living life, enjoying the holidays with my family and friends so please excuse my absence. Hope all has been well with you! Things for me have been great personally and professionally. But when it comes to romance…eh? It’s like I’m back at square one.

Cross and I kept our back and forth thing going on over the course of my absence and I decided that I was done… for real this time. He was a really nice guy, super sweet and fine, but the more I got to know him the more I realized he wasn’t it for me. As much as I enjoyed his kisses and cuddles (no worries, it’s still drought season over here), it couldn’t make up for the things he lacked. I swore up and down that I’d found my “Newer Balance” Jhené Aiko sang about on Trip but I had to remember Rotimi telling me that “there’s a difference between settling down and settling” and I refuse to settle… at least not anymore.

While I’m not even interested in crying over spilled, spoiled milk, I’m sure you’ll be happy to hear that there’s a new guy on the scene. And nope, there wasn’t any dating app action involved. This guy (I haven’t come up with a nick name for him yet) and I met at a networking mixer a few years ago. It’s crazy. I was still dating ole bae at the time and he was actually there when I met the guy… LOL small world right?

But anywho, yeah we met, it was cool. It was a group that I kinda meshed with and we all followed each other on social. Years of random likes and occasional comments went by until he randomly found his way into my DM on Instagram one day. You know me and my ridiculously oblivious self, I didn’t even peep that he was trying to bag until he hit me with the “we haven’t seen each other in a really long time, we should change that.” I’m over here thinking he’s answering the random question I posed on my Instastory, but nah. He was very forward and I grew to appreciate that. He asked for my number and we wound up texting back and forth for a few days and it was cool. He seems nice, but you know me. I’m not taking anything for more than it is in that moment.

It’s a practice I’ve started to implement since Cross. I have this really annoying habit of romanticizing people in my mind and letting that impact how I treat them and what I tolerate from them. So for now, I’m just taking things and people for who and what they are. Show me who you are through your actions and that’s who I’m going to believe you to be. I guess that’s how I know I’m done with Cross IRL. I stopped listening to the things he was saying and I started letting his actions unveil the truth about who he is. And that truth isn’t something that I wanted in my life.

But yeah, that’s my brief update. Don’t think your DMs, texts, messages have gone unnoticed. I’m still here young (depending on who you ask) and hella baeless. I’m excited to see how dating goes for me in the new year. I don’t have any resolutions in that area, but I’m sure something’ll pop off over the next 12 months.

Until next time,


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